very-short-term-bad-memory-span

i need a break... a break to sort out all my thoughts... im confuse and really tired. mentally and physically... the exams. the human to human relations. the lies, the poseurs, the illusions... to go to a resort by the sea or better still on the sea... where you can just dive into the sea from the front door literally. or just sit there, listen to the sea and just sit there... a week would be nice... no phone, internet.... totally cut off from civilisation. dont ask me why because i dont know why... but of course without the magic of a loaded bank account, the best option would be to take a bus to the sea and chuck my phone in a corner for a while... dont blame me if i dont reply... i need a breather, and its not that i dont want to hear from you... i want to hear from you, but gimme time to myself for a while... just a while.

as usual alot has happened and im just to lazy to have them in here... typing is such a bothersome thing although writing is even more tiring... using my brain itself is a bothersome job already anyway... lets see... ahh...

i must be crazy liao~ no feeling... maybe i have split personality... maybe im just lucky to be able to cry, sleep and forget just like that... okay forget not 100% but at least its like wha?? yea i had feelings but its a did or a had... i dont deny but its past tense liao... too late... you alreasy poked me with that stiletto of yours... be it freigning ignorant or really forget. maybe its a disease very-short-term-bad-memory-span... i just have to magical ability okay~ jealous? nah too bad...

ehh.... i feel uhh.... wow....~ or was it the flu medicine...?

P/S: a lil more complains...
it sucks to realise that a 'friend' that you though was a friend actually take you for a fool and treat your words lightly... are my words so frail, so unconvincing, so worthless... is it my optimistic outlook or i 'joke' too much... maybe its time i change. no jokes no funny business so that people will start to take me seriously.

i see promises as a contract that has to happen... dont break them cos it willl just make the receiver feel lousy after all that anticipation... if you cant just let me know... but please dont do things like carry out the promise on someone else... trust me, the feeling of disappointment and realising that your duped sux big time... trust me, im though these so many times already and it still sux... i hate you! i hate you! stop doing things like that to me!

JLPT3, i hope i pass this... this time round... its funny how i actually enjoy studying and how i hate it so much even now... how results actually matter to me even though i show that i dont care... (and you, dont come telling me that i deserve my stupid results! cos its my fault i did badly and i admit it! i didnt complain about my A levels! you dont have to make it sound like im sulking and making a big scene when i didnt do a single thing like that. i moved on so SHUT UP.)